THE DULL, OLD GRAY
| Work was getting pretty scarce So in desperate state of mind I travelled to the outback To see what I could find But my heart was kind of heavy And my mind was full of dread 'Cause I knew I'd have to try my luck On some damn cocky's spread I had once been to a riding school And rode a horse or two So lolling in the saddle Was something I could do When the horse was in a canter I thought myself quite hot But I was fearful of the gallop And unsteady in a trot I admire their conformation And their beauty and their grace But I prefer to sit astride them At a steady walking pace I confided in the farm boss And he kept it quiet of course For he said the men would tease me If they knew I feared a horse Then he pointed to a dull, old gray That wouldn't do me harm He assured me he was gentle And the oldest on the farm "We'll be mustering sheep tomorrow" The farm boss softly said "You should sneak out and select him While the others are in bed." Well, I spent the night quite restless At the thought of mustering sheep So I had the 'gray' all sadled While the others were asleep I thought him very ancient 'Cause he didn't want to walk It was hard to lead him from the yard He'd take two steps, then balk I meant to raise his spirits So I whispered in his ear I assured him I'd be gentle There was nought for him to fear I said I had no interest In all that cowboy rot That I wouldn't make him gallop Or even raise a trot By the time the others gathered I had not a fear of strife For I'd swept aside the old, gray's fear He'd be my friend for life All the drovers started chuckling And some laughed 'til they cried When the boss barked out his orders "Okay, mount up boys; let's ride." I didn't understand their humour Though I thought it slightly strange But I'd heard some men go 'crackers' From too long on the range I was confident and 'cocky' 'Cause I didn't have a care Until I climed into the saddle And found death waiting there He didn't give a whinny It was more a kind of squeal Then he turned his head and fixed me With eyes as cold as steel Then without a sign of warning He leapt into the air He returned to earth without me He left me hanging there He knew that he had thrown me I was falling like a sack But I swear he jumped beneath me And he caught me on his back He had a really twisted humour And he meant to have some fun He was going to give this greenhorn A close look at the sun He would pelt me to the heavens Then like some demented clown He would take up a position So he'd catch me coming down And each time we headed skyward I'm here to tell you, mate He would kind of hang suspended And do a figure eight Then he'd do a sort of jack-knife And then a swallow dive And it set my mind to doubting That I was still alive I knew my back was broken And my rear end felt such pain That I threw the reins to buggery And grabbed on to his mane But his mane was kind of slippery And it didn't soothe my fears So before I lost my deathly grip I clamped on both his ears Well, he let out such a bellow That it echoed through the place Then he threw his head back sharply And smacked me in the face I knew my nose was broken When the blood began to spurt And I prayed his game was over And he'd throw me in the dirt He didn't like his ears touched I was terrified, by heck So I quickly let his ears go And grabbed on to his neck Each time he launched us skyward I kept my arms clamped tight I had them wrapped around his throat And squeezed with all my might Then I felt his body tremble And he made a gurgling sound Then his legs began to buckle And he slumped down to the ground Well, I quickly cleared the saddle While the 'old gray' gasped for breath It was only then I realised I'd choked him half to death All the farm hands gathered 'round me As the 'gray' climbed to his feet But he didn't make a murmur He just stood there looking beat Though my nerves were wildly screaming I tried to look real cool They'd meant to have some fun with me They'd played me for a fool The farm boss looked embarrassed And he told me with a grin "You should have turned up years ago No one could break him in." "I thought we'd play a joke on you But now it's plain to see That you're skilled at breaking horses And you had the joke on me." "Though your style is quite unusual You're the only man I've found Who not only rode the gray horse But rode him to the ground." Well, I thought I'd sieze the moment So I lied right in his face "I haven't found a horse could throw me And I've been most every place." "I've broke the wildest outlaws most every place I've been; And I'm known from Perth to Queensland And every place between." "But this mustering doesn't suit me For it's not the thing I do; So I'll take my leave and vanish If it's all the same to you." Well, I left that farm so quickly I left dust clouds on the track And if they paid a million dollars They couldn't get me back And I made myself a promise And I keep it to this day That I'll never mount another horse --- Especially if he's gray. K.D. Abbott © 2007 |
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